Tag: funny

5 tips for keeping a clean house with little kids

5 tips for keeping a clean house with little kids

1. Lock them up. 2. Put them in a fenced area, no bigger than 5′ x 5′. 3. Stay awake all night to clean.  4. Live in a house likes it’s moving day. Either have everything in a box, or better yet, just have nothing […]

My kids make me swear

I meant sweat. I meant sweet. No, I meant swear. I really don’t swear. Blame it on the Catholic upbringing or just the fact that I prefer not to, because I instantly feel guilty afterward (also, blame that on the Catholic upbringing), but swearing has […]

That One Toy

For Sale Free: E-book Read A-long thingy


So we have it. That one toy that is tormenting us. Being a lover of books and reading, I was very excited to get a “my first reader” toy that would read the pages and ask questions and be oh-so-fun for Miss M. Then one day… it reared it’s ugly, possessed head. It randomly reads to you. Without a book in. It even skips pages. It reads pages from completely different books. It potentially could be teaching my kid how to rap: “The f-f-fff-fox likes *skeerrrrrr* socks!” Either it is training my kid to be the future MC*MD {her obvious DJ nickname} or stutter. One of the two.

Of course it doesn’t have an off button. And I could take the batteries out, but who has time to unscrew the tiniest screw buried deep into the plastic? We even thought it had motion sensors. Everytime we would walk over it the loooovely reading lady voice would startle awake. Or when we walked near it…or looked at it. We were convinced it simply detected vibration of any kind.

It’s favorite time to teach you to read/rap/speak out of turn/read one sentence then skip to the back page; was of course when we were all sleeping. And who decided that volume 25 was the best? You’re reading to a fresh set of ears, they haven’t had years of loud noise exposure to ruin that yet, take it down 15 notches.

M is too little to care or know the purpose of it anyways, so like I said, one amazing, alert, DJ/MC training and reading learner is for free sale!

Our first child {Tito}

As I had mentioned in my Meet Melissa section, I am a mother to 1, but 4 if you count all the pets. I looooove pets. I used to want to be a veterinarian until one {lovely} woman tried to give a bunch of 11-year-olds […]