I really don’t swear. Blame it on the Catholic upbringing or just the fact that I prefer not to, because I instantly feel guilty afterward (also, blame that on the Catholic upbringing), but swearing has always been something that only happens when I’m overly stressed, panicked, and some type of emergency may be happening. Or, as I like to call it: Mother(f*ing)hood.
It’s been an eye-opening thing to realize how little you actually knew about yourself once you become a mother. And different sides of you, or I suppose just a new you, start to evolve as you go through different seasons of motherhood. New mom, mom to multiples, mom to toddlers, mom to many…So sometimes, you pick up a new habit that you maybe don’t love.
I don’t love swearing. And, just to be clear, I definitely do NOT mean my kids make me swear at them. Never. Not okay, ever, in any circumstance. I just mean in general. It’s like I’ve become too tired to sensor myself.
There have been far too many days of loud cry-screaming, determined will to not eat a single bite of that food you just slaved over, hitting/biting/punching/squeezing/licking/holding-beyond-will moments that have made the little sailor come out of me. Some mom’s handle these times differently. I think some days I handle things differently.
But my go-to seems to be a little bit of laughter at just how insane it all is, and a little more cussing to somehow bring me through it. It’s like its a deep breathing exercise, but instead of a deep breath, its a sighed “sh*t” instead. It helps on those days where I’m also the “angry mom” and snapping those damn five hairbands off my wrist faster than I can say “sh*t happens”.
Can we all just agree that being a parent is really challenging when the kids are little? It’s precious, moves too fast, not fast enough, and all happens when we are also trying to figure ourselves out. It’s exhausting, labor-intensive, and really f*ing hard.
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PS. I’m not going to apologize this time for how long it’s been since my last blog post and make a big deal about it (okay, maybe I will passive-aggressively) oh, and hi Kate!! ?